Love & Cigars
by Stardown
Summary: Commission from Barbacar. Daisy challenges Bowser to a friendly fight after hearing about his relationship with Peach. I do not normally support Bowser x Peach.


**A/N:** This one-shot is based on an idea by Barbacar, and is not connected to The Novelized Comic.

 _ **DISCLAIMER:**_ This story contains cigars and cigarettes. I highly discourage smoking. Viewer discretion is advised.

* * *

It was a lovely day in the Mushroom Kingdom, as most days are, and Peach and Bowser were enjoying a stroll together. They were crossing the border into Sarasaland en route to visit Daisy.

"Isn't this lovely?" exclaimed Peach. "We've haven't been engaged for long now, and I can hardly wait for the wedding!"

Bowser grinned from ear to ear. "I know, right? All as foretold in the Dark Prognosticus."

"Light," corrected Peach.

"Eh, it doesn't really matter," shrugged Bowser. "For all I care, it's in both Prognosticuses… Or is it Prognostici?"

"That doesn't matter, either," reassured the princess as they walked arm in arm. "Our love is all that matters."

"That's right, dear," grinned Bowser.

* * *

They arrived at Daisy's house in a short time. The princess in orange was sitting out on her porch, smoking a huge orange cigar.

"Hi Peach!" she greeted, standing up. "You too, Bowser. I wanted to congratulate you for your relationship. I think you two make a great couple."

Before Peach knew it, Daisy had popped a large pink cigar into her mouth, and lit it with her own.

"Hey, why don't I get a cigar?" Bowser pretended to whine.

"I'll give you one… if you can beat me in a friendly battle!" challenged Daisy.

"You're on!" Bowser accepted the challenge. He rushed toward Daisy, but she nimbly stepped aside.

"You do realize you're taking on a tomboy?" taunted Daisy. "Seriously, I'm no Peach. You can do better than that."

"I'm the king of _awesome._ I _always_ do better than that!" he charged toward her again, but she leaped clear over his head.

"Go, sweetie!" Peach cheered from the porch chair previously occupied by Daisy.

"I'm trying, my dear, but she's too quick! I may have to resort to using the 'ol Flame Pipe…"

"Flame… Pipe?" Daisy was confused.

"You'll know what I'm talking about if you've ever been inside my body." With that, Bowser breathed a few fireballs out of his mouth. Daisy countered them with a large orange hammer she pulled out of nowhere.

"A hammer?" Bowser was surprised. "That's franchise plagiarism! One Amy Rose is enough!"

"Oh, that's not all I can do with it!" Daisy exclaimed. She held her hammer to her still-lit cigar, which caused it to catch fire as well. Then she swung it into Bowser with all her might.

Bowser should have probably seen the look on his face as he flew through the air, because it was priceless. He ended up slamming into Peach, much to Daisy's dismay, and the two of them flew up through the roof and out of sight, disappearing with a twinkle.

Daisy lowered her hammer. "Bowser was right. Maybe one Amy Rose _is_ enough…"

* * *

Not too long afterward, Bowser and Peach found themselves at the Comet Observatory, laughing off the fight.

"That. Was. Awesome!" exclaimed Bowser between peals of laughter.

"I know!" agreed the princess. "That was the greatest fight I ever saw! And my cigar is still lit!"

"Hello, Princess Peach. Hello, Bowser," came a voice from behind them. It was Rosalina, and she was holding a long, fancy, wand-like cigarette holder with a lit cigarette at its tip, its embers glowing like a twinkling star.

The cosmic princess looked at the pair, who were still chuckling over their experience. "I trust you have had quite an adventure, getting here without the aid of a Launch Star or space vessel…"

"No one will believe us if we say we traveled here by hammer," laughed Peach.

"...Hammer?" Rosalina was confused.

"It's a long story," shrugged Bowser. "Now, how are we gonna get back?"

Rosalina beckoned to a nearby object. "This is my Cosmic Cannon. It will take you back to your home world.

"Peachy!" remarked Peach as she and Bowser ran over to the cannon and began to climb in.

"You, Bowser, are actually the 395,942nd person to arrive here by disappearing with a twinkle!" congratulated Rosalina, popping a large black and red cigar into his mouth. Lighting the cannon with the cigarette at the end of her wand-like holder, she watched as Peach and Bowser were blasted back to their home world.

"May the stars shine down on you…" she whispered.

* * *

 **A/N:** Now that I've finished this one-shot, I'll get back to writing SMB:TNC, as well as plan for my Star Wars and Redwall crossover.


End file.
